Dr Catherine
< Back to Expert Answers
Girl
4-7 years

Hi C.G., I completely understand your frustration. In the vast majority of cases children are completely unaware that they are wetting or have wet the bed. Unfortunately there are a lot of misunderstandings’ surrounding bedwetting and it is not unusual for parents to feel that this is a deliberate behaviour. Have you tried waiting until she is actually about to get into bed before putting her into DryNites? You could adopt a routine whereby she brushes her teeth, goes to the toilet, puts on her DryNites then jumps into bed. While reward systems are generally discouraged in the management of children’s bedwetting you could certainly adopt a reward approach if you do in fact find her wetting to be deliberate. Before you look into changing this behaviour you first need to think about why it is happening. Deliberate wetting can be a sign of stress or emotional distress so it would certainly be worth talking to her to find out if anything is scaring or upsetting her. With respect to using a reward system, it is important to decide in advance with your daughter what type of behaviours you would like to encourage and how you will reward these. For example, you could reward her for removing her DryNites and putting them in the bin as soon as she wakes in the morning. Some children respond particularly well to reward charts that can cumulate or be “cashed-in” for a more significant prize or reward. Discuss with her how she would feel if she could get-up in the morning and be dry; help her identify the potential advantages of this. Remind her that you do not expect her to remain dry overnight, as nighttime wetting is something she has no control over, however it is important that she does not wee in her DryNites when she is awake. All the best! Regards, Dr Cathrine